Pre-Surgery Jitters

My pre-surgery jitters in the days leading up to my j-pouch surgery

Since getting a surgery date (May 20, 2016), anytime I look at a calendar, my pre-surgery jitters start kicking in. I’ve recently taken to looking at my stomach wondering what it’s going to feel and look like after the surgery. And that’s why I’m all about distracting and pampering myself.

Staying Distracted

I’ve been doing a lot of baking, cooking, and trying to get ahead in drafting blog posts so I can publish while in the hospital.

Hiking and enjoying little picnics by myself is helping calm the busy and frantic pace of my mind, a side effect of the prednisone. It’s crazy how fast the surgery date has crept up on me.

The fact I’m having my colon removed didn’t feel real for the longest time. But that changed eventually with my pre-operation appointments.

Pampering Myself

Besides trying to get lots of work done, I’ve also been trying to pamper myself.

Sunday, May 15th, I got all dressed up, experimented taking selfies with my new iPhone, and went to Journey Coffee to work, and treat myself to a lavender latte.

I will always remember this day vividly. While I was there, I got a call from scheduling with my surgery time. The nurse went through when I needed to arrive, where to go, and the timeline of events for that day. This moment, more than any other, was what made everything real.

While on the phone, listening in a dazed state, colors became brighter and sounds faded. I felt very present in my body like I could feel every part of it.

I packed up my things soon after because I wasn’t able to concentrate anymore.

Monday the 16th, was my appointment for a nurse to mark the place where my stoma will be if they can’t do the whole surgery in one go.

After, I treated myself to a potato gnocchi dish (golden Yukon potatoes, parmesan cream, English peas, spring onion, and wild arugula) from Corner’s Tavern in Walnut Creek, where I’m having the surgery. I loved how light it was. Usually, gnocchi is covered in lots of rich sauce but not this one.

My next post will come from either the hospital or the comfort of my bed, depending on how well I do.

My story continues in Part XII – J-Pouch Surgery

My Whole UC Story

You can read my ulcerative colitis story in order or you can browse all my ulcerative colitis and health-related posts here:

• My UC Story: where and when my ulcerative colitis symptoms first started
• Part I – The Beginning of My UC Story: what my symptoms were and the struggles I had getting health care
• Part II – UC Diagnosis and Adjustment: how I was diagnosed and how I struggled to adjust to living with ulcerative colitis (including diet experiments, and getting frustrated with doctors not listening to me)
• Part III – UC and Severe Back Pain: my ongoing struggle with severe back pain + getting a new GI doctor that listened to me and who sent me to a  rheumatologist
• Part IV – Sacroiliitis Diagnosis and UC Remission: getting diagnosed with sacroiliitis, getting on Remicade, and finally going into remission (with both my UC and joint disease)
• Part V – The Second UC Flare: my slowly deteriorating health, worsening symptoms, colonoscopy, and my first ER visit
• Part VI – First Hospitalization: my first hospitalization from my second ulcerative colitis flare and my experience with bowel rest and edema (swelling from fluid).
• Part VII – Being on Prednisone for My Second UC Flare Recovery: being on Prednisone for the first time and the various effects it had on my mind and body + adding mercaptopurine (6MP) and allopurinol to my daily routine
• Part VIII – Third UC Flare and Second ER Visit: my third UC Flare experience, symptoms, ER visit, and tests and procedures (CT scan, proctoscopy, etc.)
• Part IX – Recovering From Two Consecutive Flares: being released from the ER and the struggles of recovering from two consecutive UC flares (three months apart)
• UC Planning Realities: Trying to Write and Defend a Thesis: the difficulties in making long-term plans with UC and trying to meet thesis deadlines while in a flare
• Post UC Flare Routine: my post UC flare routine that helped me manage my physical and emotional symptoms
• Body Image and Mental Health with UC: Stop telling me I look great: the connection between body image and mental health and how my experience with ulcerative colitis has complicated my relationship with the two
• Making Travel Plans with UC: the difficulties in making travel plans with UC
• The Nightmare of Ulcerative Colitis: I compare a reoccurring childhood nightmare I had to the nightmare of ulcerative colitis
• Part X – Fourth UC Flare: My fourth UC flare experience, symptoms, hospitalization, tests, procedures, next treatment steps, and recovery
• Hanging Out in Limbo: waiting for experts to weigh in on my situation is like hanging out in limbo – I have no new treatment plan and I don’t know what the future holds
• Part XI – How Losing My Colon is a Transformation and Not a Loss: I’m losing my colon soon. But read about how this is a transformation and not a loss and how I made the decision to remove my colon
• You’ve Just Crossed Over into the Prednisone: Being on prednisone is a lot like being in the Twilight Zone. Things aren’t always what they seem, it can be hard to navigate and understand your surroundings, and often times you feel like you might never come back. Or the even scarier thought: that you might not ever want to come back.
• Recovery Reads: a list of some of my favorite books to read while recovering from UC flares, hospitalizations, and surgeries
• Pre-Surgery Jitters: my pre-surgery jitters in the days leading up to my j-pouch surgery on May 20, 2016, and how I distracted and pampered myself
• Part XII – J-Pouch Surgery: what my j-pouch surgery (proctocolectomy with ileal pouch-anal anastomosis) was like, including prep, surgery, and recovery
• J-Pouch Surgery Recovery: j-pouch surgery recovery is a full-time job with lots of road bumps along the way including bladder problems, dehydration, exhaustion, healing stitches and scars, pain and emotions, and adjusting to life with a stoma and ostomy bag
• Stoma Life: what my stoma life, the three months I lived with an ostomy bag, was like, including the physical and mental adjustments I went through, procedures, and what travel was like
• Part XIII – Pancreatitis: my struggle with pancreatitis including symptoms, tests, my ER and hospital stay, pain management, post-discharge recovery, and pre-op prep
• Part XIV – Ileostomy Takedown Surgery: how my ileostomy takedown surgery went, including prep, the surgery, hospital recovery, and complications
• Part XV – Post Operative Ileus Complications: my painful and scary experience with post operative ileus complications left me very weak, under 100 pounds, malnourished, and very close to death’s door
• Surgery Recovery and Diet Problems: Physical and diet difficulties from post-surgery recovery and complications from pancreatitis, post-operative ileus, and pouchitis
• Everything is Shiny and New
• Hitting the Wall and The Privilege of Scars and Wrinkles
• Experiencing Loss and The Power and Comfort of Creativity
• Hauntings, Superstitions, and Giving Back: Reflecting on Being Hospital Free for 2 Years